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AngryReview: Lost Series Finale (TV)

Posted by Masked D-Bag #8 on May 27, 2010 in AngryReview


So LOST is over as the final episode aired here in the US of A on 05/23/2010. A lot has been said about this series, and even more about its ending. I wanted to take this time on my SoapBox to talk about what I think LOST meant, how it ended, and if it pissed me off or left me feeling satisfied.

So what was LOST?

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SYNOPSIS OF LOST (SPOILER ALERT):

LOST is about the survivors of Oceanic 815. On 09/22/2004 their plane crashed onto an unknown island in the Pacific due to an uncontrolled electromagnetic release from the island. These survivors banded together, even though in life they were alone and battled their own inner demons privately. It was because they came together that they were able to survive (live together or die alone).

The island was found to be a special place; it was able to cure illness and wounds (like cancer or spinal damage), possessed exotic beings (like polar bears and the smoke monster), and housed unique and mysterious structures (like Egyptian structures and military bunkers). Some took these mysteries as religious signs, others thought of them as scientific mysteries; this created conflict with the survivors and split them into groups (men of faith vs men of science).

Their biggest conflict, however, was that of the original inhabitants of the island whom they called “The Others”. These Others infiltrated the survivors, spying on them in hopes of finding those who were deemed “special”. This was all done under the orders of Jacob, the island’s protector. Jacob was looking for someone to take his place as the Protector of the Island and he had been watching the survivors long before they even arrived on the Island. Jacob saw himself in these people because they were alone in life (as Jacob was alone on the island), they internally battled their demons (as Jacob battled his own), and ultimately they believed that their lives had meaning and that meaning was good.

The survivors were able to overcome their pasts and find meaning in their lives, which gave Jacob the opportunity to pass his leadership onto one of the survivors (Jack). Jack was then able to use his own faith to kill the smoke monster and bring balance back to the island. This battle did have its own consequences, as Jake was mortally wounded. Jack was able to pass the mantel of Protector to another, and ultimately saved the island from destruction before closing his eyes in death.

But even death could not stop their journey. Before “moving on” Jack and the other survivors were able to relive their lives, but this time they lived them without the influence of the island. Even though Jack was happy and no longer alone (having a beautiful wife and wonder son) he still felt his life had no real meaning and he couldn’t “let go” of his demons (mainly issues he had with his father). Only in this afterlife was Jack able to see that his life did have meaning, and the time he spent on the island were the moments in his life where he learned to have faith in himself and learned to “let go”. After realizing this Jack was able to “awaken” with the other survivors and remember their lives and even their deaths. And with this realization those survivors were able to “let go” and “move on” to the afterlife united with those they loved the most.
THE END
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OK, so if you read my synopsis and are a fan of LOST you might be bitching and complain. Odds are you want “answers” to “questions that matter”. Like “Why was Walt special?” or “How come Hurley could talk to dead people?” or “Who was the original Protector of the Island?” or “Was MiB really evil or was Jacob the evil one?”

The truth is that none of those questions matter. Many people get wrapped up in the mythology of LOST and expect every little thing to be answered. The truth is that many of these mysteries are better left unanswered as we can reflect and try to piece the answers together with our own beliefs and find our own meaning within them.

If you were upset with the LOST ending then it’s because you haven’t “let go”. You are a man of science, not a man of faith. The truth is LOST was about people, not about a place or mythology or even about mysteries. The island was just a setting, it allowed these characters to live almost a second life and find the true meaning of their lives with eachother.

That is truly what the island and even LOST represents; man’s search for the meaning of life. I found my meaning long ago, but LOST helped to show me that faith I’ve always had is really what we all yearn to obtain.

So did the LOST final piss me off? No IT DID NOT PISS ME OFF. I “let go” and appreciated this work of art from all aspects. I appreciate the hard work that all the actors put in, I appreciate the quasi-religious themes and ancient history of the show, and I appreciate their ability to have me question ever little thing even down to the end. LOST will always be with me and I thank them for giving me more faith then I ever thought I could have.

Are you a man of faith or a man of science? The answer lies within you. If the LOST ending wasn’t to your taste I bet you’re a man of science; so I say “let go” and appreciate the things we cannot explain and hold on to the things that really matter in life. Because truthfully magic is just science that is unexplained; yet magic is always cooler and more exciting. Why is that? Because of faith. Namaste!

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AngryReview: Final Fantasy II (NES)

Posted by Masked D-Bag #8 on Jan 14, 2010 in AngryReview

FF2logo
IT PISSED ME OFF:
 Horrid game. The story was boring, resulting in myself getting lost alot. The CODEWORD system they use to make conversation engaging makes me vomit and requires you to talk to EVERYONE multiple times in hopes they are the one who needs the CODE, and if they aren’t then you have to backtrack to all the other towns and search for either a new CODEWORD or the precise person who needs said CODEWORD. The experience system levels up via what you use, which would be great if it wasn’t such a slow and daunting process that causes you to level grind for hours. Overall this is the worst Final Fantasy I’ve played and I was only happy when it was over because I was done with it. Don’t play, skip from 1 to 3 and save yourself the pain. (please note this is for the NES version of Final Fantasy, as Final Fantasy II on the SNES is actually Final Fantasy IV and that game is SUPER AWESOME and not a bag of dog poop)

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AngryReview: Wolverine and the X-Men (TV)

Posted by Masked D-Bag #8 on Nov 5, 2009 in AngryReview

Mutant Lover!

It Didn’t Piss Me Off: Remeber the 90’s X-Men cartoon? Yeah, this is better! Professor X & Jean Gray have been blown-up and a year has passed since their demise. The X-Men have disbanneded and are in shambles, but Wolverine looks to regroup the team and become their new leader. This cartoon gets alot right and I can’t stress how true to the comics it is. Barrowing from storylines like Civil War, Day of Future’s Past, and Weapon X makes for a true history leason about the X-Men. And with Cyclops not the D-Bag Leader I can truly enjoy this show!! You like the X-Men? You’ll LOVE Wolverine and the X-Men!

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AngryReview: Paranormal Activity (Movie)

Posted by Masked D-Bag #8 on Nov 2, 2009 in AngryReview

Paranormal CRAP

IT PISSED ME OFF: So would you like to watch a movie that will give you motion sickness? What about over an hour of watching people just FRAK around with a camera? Yeah, that’s this CRAPTASTIC movie. WORST MOVIE OF THE YEAR! The only “good” part is when the invisible man dragged that hoe out of her bed and straight down the hallway. Yeah, that is the BEST part. Everything else is “did you hear that” Ghost Hunters Bullsheet!! Never get to see ANYTHING scary, no JUMPING parts, NOTHING! DON’T WATCH THIS CRAP! DON’T! IT PISSED ME OFF BECAUSE IT SUCKS!!!

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AngryReview: Taco Bell’s Black Jack Taco

Posted by Masked D-Bag #8 on Oct 13, 2009 in AngryReview
Taco Bell's Black Jack Taco

It Didn’t Piss Me Off: Tastes like a normal Taco Bell taco with the addition of the Pepper Jack sause (which they’ve had at Taco Bell for awhile). But they also turned the shell BLACK which I guess in some way makes it cooler (but normal black tacos are thrown away, weird huh?). Anyway, for $.89 I’d buy again, but if the price goes up OR they revert back to normal taco color I’d say pass. 

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