Posted by Masked D-Bag #8 on Jun 2, 2010 in
Angry Minute What the FRAK is wrong with the world? It must be that I am getting old and bitter because some of this shit makes no sense to me WHAT SO EVER!
Don’t you remember a simple time when people said what they meant? If I told you I was watching MUSIC TELEVISION then you assumed I was watching something/anything about music. But now when you watch MUSIC TELEVISION (aka MTV) you get shitty shit like “The Hills”, “16 & Pregnant”, “Disaster Date”, and “Jersey Shore”. None of this CRAP (and it is crap) has anything to do with MUSIC. So what the FRAK does MTV stand for? Atleast when I was growing up the shows that had nothing to do with Music tried to incorporate Music into their shows in some way (aka Beavis & Butthead).
Hell MTV peeps are such assmasters that they recognized that they wanted to play shit (and it is shit) that wasn’t music, so they made MTV2 with the slogan, “All Music All The Time”. Yeah maybe it should have said, “All Music Just Some Of the Time Because We Want Your Pregnant Teenagers Watching Us 24/7”. WHAT A FRAKING JOKE!
So you can see how PLEASED (aka PISSED OFF) I was when I flipped my TV over to Cartoon Network the other day and noticed something I didn’t expect. You see I turned my TV to Cartoon Network because I wanted to see (I know this will be a shock to all of you) some FRAKIN CARTOONS. Is that soooooo much to ask from a television network NAMED Cartoon Network?
Atleast when SciFi Network changed its format to display non-SciFi shows it changed its name to SyFy; but Cartoon Network has such enormous balls they can claim to be a network about cartoons and then show reality! WHAT THE FRAK IS WRONG WITH THE WORLD?!?!?!
Can I sue for false advertising? I mean if you say you are gonna give me cartoons and then I tune in to see some pre-teen bullshit isn’t that deceptive advertising? Bait and switch? It’s Bull and Shit is what it is!
I feel for Cartoon Network, I mean they started off amazing with shows like “Space Ghost Coast to Coast”, “Dexter’s Laboratory”, “Johnny Bravo”, “Cow and Chicken”, “I Am Weasel”, “The Powerpuff Girls”, “Ed, Edd, & Eddy”, “Courage the Cowardly Dog”, “Samurai Jack”, “Grim and Evil”, “The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy”, “Camp Lazlo”, and “My Gym Partner’s A Monkey”. These cartoons are all AWESOME and WERE what Cartoon Network WAS all about.
So now what do we get in place of cartoons? We get “Destroy Build Destroy” which is a preteen Human Wrecking Balls; “Dude, What Would Happen” which is a preteen Mythbusters; “The Outsiders” which is a preteen Ghost Hunters; “Survive This” which is a preteen Survivorman; “BrainRush” which is a preteen Cash Cab. See a pattern? That’s right, Cartoon Network should now be named “PreTeen RipOff Network” because all of this SHIT is shit we already have but now it is smothered in PreTeen BullShit!!!!!! WHAT FRAKIN FUN!!!
Cartoon Network, you are DEAD to me. You have totally alienated everyone other then your PreTeen market. You have jumped the shark and now you are fighting to stay alive because all your content for the past few years has been garbage. Nickelodeon has made a grand comeback and has sooooo many better cartoons then the current Cartoon Network cartoons and Nick doesn’t even specialize in cartoons (just look at Nick greats like “Back at the Barnyard”, “Fanboy & Chum Chum”, “SpongeBob SquarePants”, “The Fairly OddParents”, and “The Penguins of Madagascar” for some amazing examples). Nick doesn’t have to LIE TO ME about what kind of network they are, so FRAK YOU CN AND FRAK YOUR LIES!!!!!!!
So I am DONE with Cartoon Network. You are obviously not a network for anyone over the age of 13. Go play with yourselves because I won’t watch your SHIT! FRAK OFF LIARS!
Tags: 16 & Pregnant, Angry Minute, BrainRush, Camp Lazlo, Cartoon, Cartoon Network, Courage the Cowardly Dog, Cow and Chicken, Destroy Build Destroy, Dexter's Laboratory, Disaster Date, Dude, False Advertising, Jersey Shore, Johnny Bravo, Liars, Lies, MTV, MTV2, Nickelodeon, Powerpuff Girls, Samurai Jack, Space Ghost, Survive This, SyFy, Television, The Hills, The Outsiders, TV, What Would Happen
Posted by Masked D-Bag #8 on Sep 16, 2009 in
Angry Minute So if you have been living in a cave this week you may not of heard that Kanye West is back and is still a dickhead. Didn’t hear about it? Well that doesn’t surprise me because his big interruption occurred at the MTV Music Awards which shocked me for two major reasons:
1. MTV shows music videos? Though MTV is (and has been) moving away from what brought them to prosperity, they DO actually still play Music Videos. As of March 2009 they started AMTV between the glorious hours of 3am – 9am. So if you are a night owl you have the ability to actually SEE music videos ON MTV! What a crazy world we now live it, where the MUSIC station plays MUSIC!!
2. MTV is still relevant to people? This question shows my age because I expect my MUSIC station to play MUSIC! Instead we get a bunch of teenybopper shows about rich bitches who need to have their asses whooped by their parents, but instead in a desperate act for attention do almost ANYTHING (and I mean ANYTHING) for said attention. MTV is POISON to children IMO! Do you want your children raised by Tia Tequila; a bisexual looking for “love”, oh and she’s on her 3rd try/season this year? How about an uplifting show like “Engaged & Underage” teaching children underage marriage is a great idea? Spoiled brats participating in expensive and totally unnecessary birthday bashes on “My Sweet 16”? MTV is only relevant to CHILDREN! So let’s say their demographic is 12-20 years old. Why is this important? You’ll see soon enough.
So now we know who is interested in MTV we should get to the matter at hand; Kanye West. Do you know him? If not he is a self-centered rapper who believes that he is so almighty he should be written into a 21 century bible. He’s the Black Jesus, well in his mind anyway. He cries and whines when something doesn’t go his way and believes he is the greatest thing since sliced bread. He has ON MULTIPLE OCCASSIONS invaded a speech to interject his opinion. And he has even gone as far to say that the President of the United States (George W. Bush) hates black people!
So what’s the big deal? Well on Sunday night at the MTV Music Awards 2009 a young sweet lady by the name of Taylor Swift was awarded “Best Female Video” when Kanye decided to storm the stage. He rip the mic out of her hand, and started to bitch and complain about how a black artist (Beyoncé) has the “best video(s) of all time”. Many people are declaring this racism, and it defiantly borderlines such.
What the FRAK is wrong with this guy? Who the HELL is Kanye West to decide who has the best video of all time? IT’S CALL AN OPINION, AND LIKE ASSHOLES EVERYONE HAS ONE! My OPINION is that Beyoncé is hot, but her videos are ALL THE SAME. So how can you justify that she should win? YOU CAN’T SO SHUT THE FRAK UP!
Kanye later apologized, via website IN ALL CAPS to prove his ignorance (how classy). Yet he still feels he did nothing wrong, but blames his actions on the Cognac that he was swigging DURING THE AWARDS SHOW! Nothing shows class like showing up to an award show DRUNK and drinking STRAIGHT FROM THE BOTTLE ON CAMERA! Remember MTV’s main demographic are those UNDER 21! Hell, even Cognac has released a statement saying that the do NOT endorse Kanye West AT ALL and they even asked him to STOP DRINKING COGNAC as he is giving them a BAD NAME and they don’t want to be associated with the likes of him! Man, how bad do you have to be to have your alcohol tell you to stop?
Well in the end MTV booted Kanye, Beyoncé won Video of the Year later in the night and graciously offered her speech to Taylor Swift so the young singer could thank her millions of fans for their support. How convent.
If you ask me this was all a scam. Kanye, Taylor, and Beyoncé were all in on in IMO. How could they not be, esp with West and Swift both going through Universal Music Group subsidiaries? Any controversy would stir publicity for all involved (West, Swift, Beyoncé, and MTV) and any publicity is good publicity. Taylor Swift looks sweet and innocent, Beyoncé looks gracious and kind, and Kanye looks like a douchebag-a-rooni but that’s what he’s use to and he loves it because those that buy his records are exactly like him! As long as the papers are talking about him he is a “star” in his mind.
MTV is garbage and this just proves it. Kanye has done this SEVERAL TIMES on their network and they keep saying he’s “banned for life” or he’ll even say “I’ll never return to MTV again”, yet they do and they LOVE IT because of the publicity. MTV’s main audience is 12-20, yet all of their programs have complainers, whiners, and bitches who think they deserve more then they really do! Do you REALLY think you’re gonna make money performing Jackass stunts in your basement? Are you REALLY gonna be a skateboard king? Can you be a slacker and make millions, or sling coke and crack and become a rap star like your favorite MTV heroes? For a network that is for the youth I find that our youth looks to be lost causes if THIS is what they believe! Wonder why our kids have such self-serving attitudes? Gee, I wonder why!
Do you know why Kanye West thinks he is relevant? Because MTV thinks he’s relevant. The funny thing here is that MTV thinks THEY’RE relevant. I record nothing of MTV, watch no MTV shows, and haven’t been a fan since Beavis and ButtHead had NEW episodes.
This will be my first, last, and only article about MTV as I don’t want to provide them with any credit or publicity. This Angry Minute will stand FOREVER as my testament against the Dark Empire known as MTV. I’ll never watch you, I’ll never support you, and the truth is NO ONE CARES ABOUT MTV ANYMORE!
Oh and Kanye; If the category was “People Who Annoy Me” then the answer would be Kanye West the Nagger!
And BTW, Obama thinks you’re a jackass! Man, even the Black President is against you dawg. You’re such a Gay Fish!
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REFERENCES:
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/music_blog/2009/09/kanye-west-apologizes-to-taylor-swift-.html
http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1621389/20090913/west_kanye.jhtml
http://www.kansascity.com/stargazing/story/1443233.html
http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/TV/09/14/mtv.music.video.awards/index.html
http://headlineplanet.com/home/2009/09/14/wwe-title-holder-comments-on-kanye-taylor-swift/
http://www.dailyfill.com/11-Quotes-That-Prove-Kanye-Is-A-Douchebag-22511/
http://cognac.com/kanye-and-cognac-its-the-class-not-the-glass/
http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/kanye-wests-outbursts/story?id=8568701
http://www.politico.com/click/stories/0909/did_obama_call_kanye_a_jackass.html
Tags: Angry Minute, Awards, Beyoncé, Children, Kanye West, MTV, Music, Taylor Swift, Television